One quick question for everyone to think about…
In the new “Head & Shoulders Shampoo” commercials, Heather Graham is featured. When she talks about her itchy red flaky scalp (shudder) and looks down briefly, why oh WHY does she look so much like a skeleton suffering from muscular dystrophy?
Didn’t those editors even PREVIEW the commercial before airing it?
As some of you non-Canadians may know, semi-recently the Canadian government effectively ‘fell’ (the Liberal Party of Canada was called out due to many of their folleys).. The actual Federal election that SHOULD have taken place in two years is now taking place on Monday the twenty-third of January (this year, 2006) rather than in 2008. That’s quite a jump in my opinion.
So who are the front-runners? The Liberals, the N.D.P. (New Democratic Party of Canada), the Green Party and my own choice, the Conservative Party of Canada. I bet you have already guessed just who I will be voting for this coming Monday. While I do not agree with some of their ideas on abortion, gay-righta and free-trade with the U.S.A., I still consider them to be the better out of all four main parties.
Why am I not voting for N.D.P? I consider them to be the bastard child of the Liberals, the bleeding-hearts if you will of Canada. Their hears are in the right place, but I don’t care for some of their methods of attaining them. Why not the Greens? Although they have some excellent political ideas, I don’t feel like throwing my vote away. Their following just isn’t big enough for me to warrant voting for them… yet. Onto the Liberals… where should I begin?
Not only have those buggers swindled millions upon millions of dollars from the taxpayers of Canada, but they ahve also cost me thousands of dollars out of my own pockets which has been (in my opinion) placed in the hands and pockets of the C.C.R.A. and their bosses back in Ontario. Thanks boys?
What are your opinions on the matter? If you are brave enough to answer, who will YOU be voting for and why? If you aren’t from Canada, who WOULD you vote for in our situation?
January 13th, WP Press
At a pre-election campaign meeting in the riding of Newmarket-Aurora this afternoon, Prime Minister Paul Martin announced a National Ban on Crime and Criminals. The move is expected to draw wide ranging support from voters in cities such as Toronto and Vancouver, which have recently been plagued by a wave of gun violence and where crime rates have traditionally been higher.
�This Government will pass new legislation aimed at decreasing crime rates across Canada by clearly defining the traditional definition of Crime�, said Martin.
�We feel that this legislation, coupled with our initiative to ban handguns, will result in a significant decrease in Crime in all areas of the Country�, said Martin. �The numbers are in, people. I�m not making this up. Clearly, crime is a problem in our Metropolitan areas and I think all Canadians can agree that there�s no legitimate excuse for crime anywhere in our society. A Liberal Government will ensure that Crime is banned all across Canada, making our streets safer for everyone�.
When asked how the ban was intended to combat violent offences and property offences, Mr. Martin responded �The Liberal Government knows that Canadians are law-abiding people. We know that any ban will be respected by our law abiding citizens, and as a result we know that banning crime is the most effective solution to the problem.�
When asked for comment, former Conservative MP Belinda Stronach and current Liberal Incumbent for Newmarket-Aurora stated Of course I support this initiative by Mr Harper. I mean Mr Martin whatever��
Conservative leader Stephen Harper commented on the announcement by saying What an assinine�I mean�no really, what a fucking stupid�.how fucking dumb does he think we are?�
Marijuana party leader Blair Longley, found on a nearby bench consuming Cheetos and pizza crusts responded to the Liberal announcement by saying �Dude, I need a fucking sandwich man.�
NDP leader Jack Layton commented on the Liberal announcement by saying �There is a third option. The NDP party stands on its reputation of brining real change. Just look at what we did with the last Liberal budget. There is a third option. The NDP party stands on its reputation of brining real change. Just look at what we did with the last Liberal budget. There is a third option. The NDP party stands on its reputation of brining real change. Just look at what we did with the last Liberal budget.�
The latest announcement comes amid poll statistics that suggests the Liberals have been losing ground to Stephen Harper�s Conservatives over a perceived �soft-stance� on crime.
�Call me crazy, but it�s about time Canadians stood up and banned Crime once and for all,� said Martin. �A Liberal Government will do just that�.
Written by Mr. M. Morbius
